Kendall L. Stewart, M.D.

Why are leaders hesitant to do this?

Writing a Code of Conduct and an organizational policy for enforcing it are necessary but insufficient. Most leaders will readily agree that these steps are necessary. But many leaders will balk when it comes to actually enforcing the policy. As you know, actually doing something is the hard part.

Why should you do it anyway?

When you make a reasonable suggestion about how organizational leaders should consistently respond when someone misbehaves, they will have a hard time not supporting the process. When the time comes to follow the process, they will have a hard time avoiding doing what they’ve agreed to do. After all, it’s company policy and procedure.

How can you do it?

1. Draft a practical process to accompany the proposed policy. It is always better to offer a specific recommendation and invite others to comment. If you ask others what they think you should do about anything, the differing opinions and feelings about them will doom your effort from the start. If you suggest a simple and practical process, most people will have a hard time suggesting a better alternative. It’s just human nature.

2.  Secure the support of the Human Resources Department. They are the official organizational nags. They know the law. They have legal consultants who can and do strike the fear of God into even the most cowardly leaders.

3. Make sure that the process is utilized effectively at least once. It gets a lot easier after that. When weak leaders see that bad actors can be held to account and the world does not come to an end, they will breathe a sigh of relief, cautiously stick their heads up out of their holes and begin to feel and act like they are really in charge.

What is your simple process for dealing with disruptive behavior? How does it work? How would you improve it?

Kendall L. Stewart, M.D.

Why are leaders hesitant to do this?

When you decide to take a stand against disruptive behavior in your organization, you will be surprised how many colleagues will look at their shoes. They will make excuses for the disrupters. Enablers will suggest the bad behavior is not really that bad and, even if people shouldn’t behave that way, they don’t do it very often. After all, these are powerful people. You don’t want to make them mad or upset them. You will be amazed at how fearful leaders will be of confronting their powerful colleagues. 

 Why should you do it anyway?

Don’t let your spineless colleagues weaken your resolve. If you persist you can find a few leaders who, when persuaded effectively and presented with the evidence, will support a meaningful policy on disruptive behavior.

How can you do it?

1. Make the case first to your peers. They will be the easiest to convince. They know what is really going on. They know the damage disruptive behavior and the resulting stress are causing.

2. When you have persuaded a critical mass of determined leaders, make the case for dealing effectively with disruptive behavior to your boss. Ask her to make the case to her peers. Spread this infection of principled determination all the way to executive suite and the board.

3. Supply the fainthearted with the evidence. The scientific case is solid. Disruptive behavior causes stress and stress causes absenteeism and turnover. In a today’s global market, the company that deals effectively with disruptive behavior and creates an enjoyable work environment enjoys a considerable competitive advantage.

4. Explain exactly how to do it. Draft a process for dealing with code of conduct violations when they occur. Make sure it is simple, reasonable and fair. Base it on a policy that similar organizations have successfully deployed.

How have you engaged your organization’s leaders in the quest to attach appropriate consequences to disruptive behavior?

Kendall L. Stewart, M.D.

Why are leaders hesitant to do this?

Most organizational Codes of Conduct could be summarized in two words—Be Nice. It seems silly to have to spell this out for adults, but you do. Those who behave badly and bully others feel entitled to behave the way they do because they have seen others behave that way and get away with it. Because they are relatively powerful, they don’t think the rules should apply to them. Disruptive people think they are too important to be annoyed or frustrated by others’ mistakes, ignorance or shortcomings. It’s all about them. And compared to everyone else, they are just about perfect. Arrogance provides great comfort to the insecure.

Why should you do this anyway?

If you are going to hold people accountable, you must be clear what you are holding them accountable for. Once you have published your Code of Conduct and required your colleagues to agree to behave in accordance with it, you can remind them of their commitment when they transgress. If you have no guiding document, you will spend your time arguing about whether what they did was disruptive or simply an exercise of their first amendment rights. People are entitled to express their positions good naturedly, but they are not free to be nasty or disrespectful.

How can you do it?

1. Specify the kinds of behavior that you will not tolerate. List the categories of unacceptable conduct. Most disruptive behaviors fall into a few general categories of obnoxious behavior.

2. List some specific examples of unacceptable behavior for those who just don’t get it. Everyone will have a clearer understanding of what you expect if you include some actual behavioral examples from your own workplace.

3. Make it clear that your list of examples is not exhaustive. It is not necessary to list every possible example of boorish behavior. Both the perpetrators and the victims will get the point.

What categories and examples have you included in your Code of Conduct?

Kendall L. Stewart, M.D.

Why are leaders hesitant to do this?

Very few people are willing to speak in a helpful way about disruptive behavior in the workplace. Those who behave badly feel perfectly entitled to behave the way they do. They believe leaders should not only tolerate their outbursts because they are so special, but they actually believe they are providing a valuable organizational service by bringing others’ shortcomings to everyone’s attention. The victims of workplace abuse are hesitant to speak up because they fear that their tormentors will just make their lives more miserable if they do. Bystanders don’t want to become the next victims.

Why should you do this anyway?

There are always a few hearty souls who will speak the truth to power. They are confident in themselves. They know the difference between right and wrong, and they don’t particularly care what others think. They are primarily interested in creating a pleasant and respectful work environment and in getting the work done.

How can you do it?

1. Invite a few of your model employees to a focus group meeting. Pick people who are willing to tell you what they really think. Don’t invite the whiners and complainers. And don’t ask the disruptive people what they think.

2. Ask them whether disruptive behavior is a problem in the workplace. If you ask sincerely and listen attentively, they will tell you the truth. Thank them for their forthrightness. Do not be defensive.

3. Invite them to describe the disruptive behavior they have observed. They will provide you will specific examples that you can use when you draft your organization’s Code of Conduct.

What have your best employees told you about disruptive behavior in your workplace?

Kendall L. Stewart, M.D.

Why are leaders hesitant to do this?

It is embarrassing to admit the truth. We would all rather pretend that while bullying may be a problem in other organizations, we behave better than that at our place. Moreover, real stories may be hard to come by. Most bullying occurs in secret and the victims often keep these incidents to themselves. They may conclude that there is nothing they can do. They may view such abuse as part of the job.

Why should you do it anyway?

Real stories carry an emotional heft that dry statistics will never possess. Real stories face up to the problem and admit our failure to contain it. Such stories make leaders more credible while holding them accountable. Real stories give victims hope and give notice to the bullies among us that you are on to them.

How can you do it?

1. Encourage careful documentation of bullying episodes. This is the first step in managing this occupational hazard. Someone must document exactly what happened. The victim may need help from a supervisor to get this done. It is impossible to write a detached “police report” when you are upset.

2. Use documentation to tell a story without naming specific individuals. It is tempting to hold the bully publicly accountable, but victims will not want to be perceived as too weak to stand up to their tormentors.

3. Use the story to illustrate how such behavior should be managed.  Harness the emotional power of real stories to illustrate how leaders should respond when bullying occurs. If the incident was not managed well, admit that. Talk about what you have learned and about your intention to respond more effectively in the future.

What actual examples of bullying in your workplace have you shared with your coworkers?

Kendall L. Stewart, M.D.

Why are leaders hesitant to do this?

None of us wants to admit that bullies torment others in our organizations. We like to think we are above that sort of thing, that we have selected kinder, more civilized folk to serve in our companies. We don’t want to admit that our coworkers don’t feel free to stand up and speak out. We don’t like to admit that we have allowed powerful jerks to get away with it. And we certainly don’t like to admit that, sometimes, we are the bullies ourselves.

Why should you do it anyway?

The evidence is clear. We have a problem. Some of us may have a bigger problem than others, but human nature is still what it is. People in a relative position of power will always be tempted to use that power to intimidate others, and bullying is the preferred way to do it.

How can you do it?

1. Conduct an anonymous survey. Ask every employee two questions: “Have you ever witnessed workplace bullying here?” “Have you been a victim of workplace bullying here?” Administer the survey in a way that no one can figure out who said what.

2. Make the survey results public. Use the data you obtain in a presentation on the topic. Publish the results in the company newsletter. Compare your survey findings with national survey data.

3. Take a public stand. Begin to contain your bullying problem by taking a public position that you will not tolerate disruptive behavior in your workplace. Just saying this is not enough. You must follow through on your commitment.

How have you personally acknowledged the problem with disruptive behavior in your workplace?

Kendall L. Stewart, M.D.

People sometimes behave badly at work. We wish they didn’t. When they do, we would rather not deal with it. We would all prefer that such unpleasantness would just go away and not recur. But our failure to deal effectively with disruptive behavior at work—or anywhere else for that matter—means it will recur more often.

Disruptive behavior creates real problems in the workplace. It causes stress and aggravation for everyone involved. Good people start to dread coming to work. Mistakes happen, motivation falters and results suffer. If this continues, the best workers will find another place to work. When bad behavior goes unchallenged others will conclude they can get away with it too and start to behave the same way. Before you know it, the jerks are running the company.

This means that effective leaders must confront and contain disruptive behavior in the workplace if they hope to retain their best people and produce exceptional results. No large organization has yet reported it has entirely eliminated disruptive behavior. Unrestrained, boorish behavior will always emerge. It is not easy, but inappropriate behavior must be addressed. This blog entry and those that follow will suggest a practical approach to this frustrating leadership challenge and explain exactly how leaders can get it done.

1.  Admit you have a problem. This is not an easy step to take. We select the best colleagues we can find and we hate to admit that we were wrong. Since the most disruptive people usually have critical skills, we are strongly inclined to tolerate their shortcomings.

2. Make up your mind. Most of us know what we need to do, but we just don’t want to do it. If you wait until you feel like confronting disruptive behavior in your workplace, you never will.

3. Line up the support you need. As you know, many executives and board members just want to avoid discomfort. These natural weenies are inclined to wave the white flag when the going gets the least bit tough. You must make sure they will hold the line when the disruptive people reach out and touch them. And they will.

How do you deal with disruptive behavior in your work environment?